New Patient Story

I have suffered from mental illness my whole life. There's a deep ravine of generational dysfunction that runs through both sides of my family. I grew up in an abusive home and my family lacked basic life and coping skills. Back in the 80's and 90's, there were not many resources for mental health or suicide awareness and prevention. When I was 16 years old, I was in so much pain that I just wanted to end my own life. I miraculously survived my first suicide attempt in February 1997. I was admitted to a psychiatric hospital where I was diagnosed with Depression and PTSD. There, my life path changed and began my long road to recovery. Fast-forward 7 years to February 2, 2004; I tragically lost my Dad because he died by suicide. I loved him deeply and surviving his loss about destroyed me. Life after surviving such an unimaginable loss has been hard, heavy, and grief-ridden. It has taken me many years to fully come to terms with and make peace with his loss. I have had many other mental health difficulties, surviving 2 more personal suicide attempts in February 2009 and February 2014. My healing journey has been long, and I am grateful for how far I have come. It has taken me this long to actually find my voice. I finally embraced my grief and learned how to allow myself to feel all the emotions. My grief has come in waves. I still have good days and bad days. His memory is imprinted in my heart as a badge of honor, and I hold a very sacred place for all my memories of him. I have stayed consistently active in therapy and counseling and all the tools I have been taught through this mental health journey are utilized daily. I practice healthy self-care techniques and I learned many valuable lessons over the years to use my experience to educate and help others that struggle as well. Therapy has provided me with so many wonderful resources to work through all my grief and my issues as well as enabled me to continue pushing forward. I passionately advocate with the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention West Chapter as a volunteer to help raise awareness and break the stigma.